--------------------------CAUTION : BROKEN ENGLISH BELOW---------------------------------
It's better for you to skip if you only want know my ki-siao life.
I have no idea why is it I'm still fall for him. It's like months. I thought I can be like a boss and don't give a fuck, but I can't. It's not that he is the most handsome guy, nicest guy, cutest guy in the world, but my heart and mind are full of his smile, his face, everything that he ever told me, and what we ever did together. I barely can't forget about those little things between me and him.
He hugged me from behind, and asked me whether if I still like him, I regard that I can even say NO loudly, but I failed. I can't even shake my head or say the NO out loud. I bet I still like him, like seriously. I don't understand, it's have been how many days and months, why I can't remove him from my mind. I hate myself for being like this. I said yes, the worst part was he whispered to my ear, and said "Sorry that I don't like you."
I smiled and said "I knew it!" However the smile was fake, my tears filled my eyes, and nearly drop down. If only he can heard my broken heart.. If only he willing to layer by layer peel open my heart, he will discover and surprise, cause he is my most suppressed and deepest secret.
He even told me that he gonna leave for 5 years or even more. If only he know that I will wait for him no matter how long, but if he likes me too. It's no use for waiting a guy who won't look at me now or even after 5 years. He really do love that girl, I can't replace her in his heart. I will let go of everything about him now.
Before I leave, I hugged him tightly and don't even wanna let go. Cause it might gonna be the last hug for us. If me and him got future, then someday we surely will meet each other and I believe it. (: As long as he knows how I feel for him now. I love him without any regret.
- sore dewa.
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